Experiment with the ones that seem right for you: During the year of sobriety, a long term girlfriend and I broke up. In I decided to take on a new personal challenge: With new friends, with new songs, with the blue sky, with Louis CK sketches and Joan Didion lines, and every once in a great long while, with a human person. This made her uncomfortable. If you feel pulled towards going out and getting drunk, do it. January is probably the easiest. A note about dealing with intense pain: I felt left out. So my question to you is, can I show up to the date at a bar and tell them THEN and just sip a water while they have a beer?
The Downside Even the most positive change has some negative side effects. Falling in love sober is the greatest. A roomy section of my brain was roped off for this purpose. And the truth is, I fall in love sober all the time: The default attitude towards drinking is that everyone drinks. Are all of the days in my life great now? I spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to have more good days without the bad ones, but I could never find a solution. When I quit drinking, it happened automatically. I get a seltzer, he gets a beer, and we talk. We were no longer sharing the experience as closely as when we were both drinking or both sober. I mentioned earlier that an ex-girlfriend and I had a fight over my choice to give up drinking. I invited people to join me. Some months are much easier to spend sober than others. So how do you even get them to meet you!? Not dating those guys freed me up to find someone who might be interested in a short, blonde, non-exotic girl named Sarah. I can make arguments either way. Most of the dating world looks like this: On very special occasions, I can see having a drink from time to time. Collectively, they emptied out my wallet. Is he worth all this trouble? I was NOT cool. Before the year of sobriety, I was probably What you are, however, is a person who is no longer like the rest of the herd. Did I wear the right thing? Are you worried about what other people will think?
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